Oddly, this is about how I feel with my Trenchcoat.
That's quite odd.

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Mi scusi per il mio Italiano.

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Are you sure it's not that the coat is just comfortable?

Anyway, as far as the poem goes, I think brevity will get the message across better than it is right now. In the first line, for example, you could get rid of "all over me", as it's implied that the coat is covering you.

Also, I think you could experiment with structure some. Maybe consider having the word "nothing" stick out a little more each time it's repeated. It'll give the impression of the narrator originally saying it to the reader, and then with each repetition, it's more of the narrator trying to convince himself.

Que interesante, Omri. Stuff on your mind?

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"One of my first projects as the God of Literature would be to remove all the adjectives from say, Conrad's Heart of Darkness." - `AbCat

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mde me smile and recall my own coat-phase. loved the whole of it but don't change it too much because i felt that the length was perfect as it was. and the rhythm of the first line would kinda mess up (imo) if you took out 'all over me'. i could be wrong, of course, but that's how i felt.

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what we choose is never what we really need


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I took this to mean that you wanted to make an attempt to either pull back or to try and slow down - in either case, it might be best to try and breathe and take one day at a time.

Enjoyed the piece.

Much love,


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A lot of publishers and published poets hate uneven lines, so maybe add stop to that last line to kind of even it out some? Great job otherwise though

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~Take my hand and hold me close, Forever with you is my dose.~

I have tried to capture the full and most abrupt presence of that word. To truly make a non-compromising Stop. Do you think that it would hurt the strength of it if I'll merge it?

Also, why do you think that they hate uneven lines? I would like to know more about this.

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Some days I write those words, others they write me.

Yeah... It's pretty much true... *hug*.

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Some days I write those words, others they write me.

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Some days I write those words, others they write me.

Possibly could, so I would leave it as it.

I have been to some master classes with Billy Collins and some of my creative writing teachers are published poets and they all tell me that more often than not publishers dislike uneven lines because it often means that the meter is off, or something is off. I should probably ask in more depth next time, but most of the published poets I've asked said the same thing

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~Take my hand and hold me close, Forever with you is my dose.~